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This is not going to be my usual blog, but more of a story for all women.  I like to cryptically call it, “My Handsome Hungarian.”  We never know in our lives where we will find ourselves and what circumstances will eventually find us living a fairly full life, yet without the intimacy of a partner to hear the tale of our day, to curl up with in the evening, and the intoxicating scent of cologne that makes our hearts beat faster.  So this is a lesson for women, young and old alike, should your life path eventually cause you to taking a leap of blind faith back into the world of dating.  It began with my own curiosity; trying one more time (I promised myself) into the world of on line dating.  I say one more time as I seem to be a magnet for men who are trying vainly to relive their sexual prime, arrive at your inbox loaded with baggage, and on occasion, are far more interested in what you have to offer than learning about the person you are.  This  time however, I found myself blind-sided, and quite taken by surprise.  It began with the picture above of the handsome Hungarian who dropped me a note, and asked if I would correspond with him.  I obliged, and so it began.  He was a widow, losing his wife in a car accident eleven years ago.  He had one relationship since then, but found that she had been unfaithful and as a result had given up on all women.  He expounded on his own lessons……like so many, deciding to try perhaps one more time for an intelligent soul mate…hoping for a monogamous relationship which would lead to a lifetime. He owned his home, he studied abroad, he wrote poetry and quoted Caesar.  He was at a good place in his life….career well established, but looking for that missing piece to make his life complete.  Apparently he found it in me.  His emails arrived in my inbox promptly by 10:00 each morning and with each letter, he became more entranced with me.  He asked me for a picture and thought I was beautiful.  I could not believe my luck (first mistake) in stumbling across such an intelligent, handsome man.  He sent me his private email address (second mistake) and expounded on how he was a Christian.  He even called me (yea, third mistake in sharing my number) and his shy accent swept me off my feet.  Of course he was on his way to church that day so he promised he would call again.  He claimed to do consulting work for companies and shortly thereafter, left for Texas to present a proposal for an engineering job.  We continued to communicate daily.  He got the bid, and of course the job had to begin immediately on the Irish Sea (really?) and left for England for three weeks.  In those ensuing three weeks his emails continued and with each one, his affection grew and grew…..I had melted his hardened heart, he adored me, he thought of me all the time and he was anxious to return to the States where he would sweep me into his arms and deliver my first kiss.  Now at this point, my dearest friends and family had more sense than I, and cautioned me…..they worried that he was just too good to be true.  I just wondered if perhaps, just perhaps, it was my time to be happy…..and in all honesty my heart pounded like a school girl every time I saw a letter from him.  In retrospect, I did feel some signs, but they were so insignificant that I passed them off as being jaded….perhaps too cautious.  He now sent me text messages on occasion…asking me if I knew just how much he loved me.  Looking at his picture, who wouldn’t enjoy this?!  He used hungarian words on endearment in his letters and we spoke again on the phone.  He even went so far as to quote scripture to me in a letter, telling me that God had brought us together.  I was, blindly, happy.  There was a fire on the ship he was working on and he lost his wallet (flag).  The British customs wanted $50,000 to release his equipment and he had only budgeted $30,000 (flag).  He wrote that he longed to be back in the States with me.  My friends and family began to be more worried and cautioned me to be careful.  I was, actually and when he called one morning at 6:00 am to “hear my voice” I was beaming…..and then he asked to borrow $5,000.00  I said no, of course that was something I could not do.  Shortly thereafter he apologized and professed his love for me into the next week.  One night, I sent him an email, asking how the project was going, had he solved his problem with the British Customs and when would he be flying home.  His email to me in return was to plead with me, out of our love for each other, to send him $3,000.00  (Big flag).  Once again, I said no and went on to tell him how disappointed I was that he didn’t hear me the first time.  I said I would not loan money to him in as polite a way as I could.  That’s when the handsome Hungarian disappeared.  So this is a life lesson, and a word of caution to anyone who ever finds themselves in a similar situation.  The only thing I lost was a bit of my dignity as not only did I post it on FB (good lord :() but that this person, whomever he really is, knew what to say, how to say it, and hopefully how to profit from his efforts.  The world I still believe, is filled with good people and in my heart I want to believe that if I treat others with kindness, respect, and compassion that surely it will be returned to me.  I am rather naive, but I don’t choose to change as I truly believe that good wins over evil every time.  I am a romantic, and I want to believe that true love exists.  I leave you therefore, with this word of caution not to be jaded by those who wish to rob you (literally and figuratively).  Believe in love, believe in goodness, but be aware.  Have a good week everyone.

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